Thursday, October 26, 2006

12 - Answer(s)

Q: Brett Gobe - How do you measure yourself against other golfers?
A: Chevy Chase would answer this question with, "By height." I am a much more infrequent golfer than he (I've played three times in the past four years), but I'll give the same answer since it gives me a greater chance of victory than if I played golf straight-up against other golfers.

Q: Bill Jeffers - Will the Yankees ever win it all again?
A: My initial answer is "I hope not." As a fan of the Boston Red Sox since childhood, I have a nearly genetic predisposition to hating the NY Yankees. Therefore I hope that their six-year trend of failure in the postseason continues into the next century. But even I must admit that yes they will win it all again. I personally think that it'll take another two or three years of failure before they accept the fact that trying to buy the best players and placing them on the field together does NOT a team make. Of course, they could always purchase every other team in major league baseball and win by default, but that's pushing even my Yankee-hating boundaries.

Q: Eric Carney - You have Box and you have Wine. Two of my most favorite things united in what can only be described as a monumental achievement of the late 20th century. There's no question here I justed wanted to say I love Boxed Wine.
A: That was Eric Carney, former Pep Band President. He was damned glad to meet you.

Q: Adam Barnello - What would you do for a Klondike Bar?
A: First, I would get up from the comfortable couch on which I am typing these words. I would then put on my coat, leave my apartment, get into my car and drive to Wegmans. Once at Wegmans I would find the frozen dessert section and get a package of Klondike bars. I would then exchange cash for said Klondike bars at a checkout register and leave the store. I would then have the Klondike bars, and could do with them whatever I wished. Fling them at passing motorists, rub them in my hair, or even consume them with a nice glass of milk. Whatever came into my head.

Q (repeat): Nicole Maloney - What kind of music was played at weddings before the 70's came along?
A: I asked around about this question, and everyone I asked had pretty much the same two answers as me: either the popular music of the day, or the music that the bride and groom request. This makes sense. The wedding reception will reflect the tastes of the bride and groom, and therefore the music played at the reception will mirror those tastes. All things being equal, popular music of the day is probably the most common music played at weddings in all times. Some couples may choose to have something different, such as a string quartet, a jazz band, or even a carribian steel band. It's really up to the bride and groom (which means the bride).

Thursday, October 19, 2006

11 - Answer(s)

Q: Brett Gobe - Why do they rock so hard? Did I already ask this?
A: First, a quick parusal of the Ask Mitssob Archives shows me that you have not asked this question yet. Second, I think that "they rock so hard" because they feel that they must. Let me explain. "They" feel that the only way that they can express themselves is to "rock", and therefore in order to express themselves to the fullest they must rock "hard". Who are "they"? What does it mean to "rock"? What qualifies as "hard"? I don't have the answer to those questions. Perhaps next time I'll revisit this.

Q: Bill Jeffers - Why can't I get paid to be good at video games?
A: While it is possible to be paid to play video games, these jobs generally take the form of "game tester" or "game developer". The question you ask relates to the quality of your video game playing, and I'm here to report that you in fact can get paid to be good at video games. Granted, this payment does not take the form of a salary with benefits, but there are many competitions out there for gamers to compete in. These competitions have prizes that can go into the tens of thousands of dollars. You must be very good in order to compete, but if you are good enough, then you can indeed be "paid to be good at video games." Best of luck with that, Bill :)

Q: Sarah LaBombard - where are the best bagels?
A: The literal answer to your question is "where the best bagels are made." But since I know that this is what your question implied (and since if I don't answer this, you'll be mad at me), let me take a crack at it. First, I would say that the best bagels are generally accepted to be found in New York City. I did a quick search and found H&H Bagels, which is reported to have the best. I can't honestly judge this because I've never had their bagels, but I'll pass the link along.

For my money, the best bagels that I find locally are from Brueggers. Are they the "best"? Probably not, but they're my favorite. Please feel free to comment, Jolinko community, and help find the best bagels!

Q: Nicole Maloney - What kind of music was played at weddings before the 70's came along?
A: This question is going to be put off until next week, Nicole. I want to do some actual research on this question because I'm also curious about it. So tune in next week (and also feel free to submit other questions for me to ponder in the interim).

Thursday, October 12, 2006

10 - Answer(s)

Q: Bill Jeffers - Will this be the year the Sabres bring home Lord Stanley's Cup?
A: Unfortunately, I don't know. More to the point, I won't even hazard a guess at this point in the season. The Sabres have definitely been improving over the past few years. They've got tgot some hot rookies (Jason Pommenville and Ryan Miller, both former Amerks), as well as a solid cast of verterans (Daniel Briere, Chris Drury, and Marty Biron). I think they can compete with the best of the NHL, but as we all know that's not necessarily enough. On a personal level, I certainly hope they win the cup. As a transplanted New Englander, my sports loyalties still lie in that region, but the one exception has been the Sabres (I was a Whalers fan before they moved, and don't really care for the Bruins). So go Sabres!

Q: Jennifer Walden - Why can I 'drop out' of school, but I have to 'quit' my job?
A: The first thing to do is get some definitions, courtesy of The definition of "quit" that fits best to your question is "To give up; relinquish." The definition of "drop out" that fits is "to stop attending school or college." So it seems that the initial answer to your question lies in the very difinitions of the words that are used.

But I find this an interesting question, so I'll dig a little deeper. I think that part of the difference in terminology comes from the difference between school and work. "School" is a voluntary activity in which an individual pays money to an organization, and in return the organization educates the individual. "Work" is a voluntary activity in which an organization pays money to an individual, and in return the individual gives worth to the organization.

I see the difference between the two in the expectations of the parties. In the case of work, you (the individual) have obligations to the organization. If you choose not to perform those obligations, then you have quit. The organization will stop paying you because you have stopped adding worth to the organization. In the case of school, you are obligated to pay and to learn. Should you choose to end, then you simply leave. The organization will not be paid, but they will also not be educating you.

I guess the real answer for me lies in another difference between school and work. School is not only an educational institution, but also a care-giving one. When you go to school as a child, then you are under their direct care. When you go to school in college, you often live on campus and are a part of the larger college community. When you choose to leave school prematurely, you are truly "dropping out" of the community. The same cannot be said of work. If you stop working, then you quit. There is a "dropping out", but it's not the same as school.

So those are my thoughts on that subject. I may come back to this question; it's more interesting than I expected. Thanks, Jen!

Thursday, October 5, 2006

9 - Answer(s)

Q: Bill Jeffers - Why are boobs so attractive to men? (Well, and some women I suppose)
A: From theoretical physics to boobs in the span of two weeks. Bill, you're one of a kind.

In all seriousness, this is a very good question. Let me try a simple thought experiment first, then lay out some other related thoughts on this topic (I might have to come back to this one in the future; it's a good question). One primary goal that men have is to spread their genes in the gene pool. This is done by finding a woman (or many women) and mating with her so that she will produce his offspring. The first step that the man must take in this goal is to find a woman. Breasts are one of the distinguishing physical characteristics of women. Therefore, men will seek breasts in order to separate the women from the men. Therefore, men are attracted to breasts. Was that a silly thought experiment? Yes, but it's literally true, so it provides a little value to this discussion.

Something I saw on TV (the Discover Channel or TLC, I can't remember which) a few years ago provides more fodder for this question. The subject was why males are attracted to certain characteristics of females. I learned from this show that men in general are attracted to cleavage, and not necessarily breasts. They showed examples of cleavage in the knees, the butt, and the breasts in several females, and all three were remarkably similar. I found this rather interesting at the time, and still do, so I think part of the answer is that men are not necessarily attracted to breasts, but to cleavage in women.

Another reason that boobs are attractive to men is their role in childbearing. There is a theory in biology that suggests that men are attracted to women with large breasts because they (the men) view them (the breasts) as a sign that the woman is better able to provide for his offspring than women with smaller breasts. Is this true? I'm not sure. It's certainly logical, at least on a subconcious level.

I guess the answer to this question can be best summed up by Brett Gobe: "Because they're boobs". Truer words were never spoken.

Q: Brett Gobe - Why do I always lose socks in the laundry?
A: One answer is that the socks are getting left behind in either the washing machine or the dryer. I've noticed that my socks tend to stick to the inside of my dryer sometimes, meaning that they'll occasionally get left behind. Similarly, I've found that my socks can get wedged undernieth the agitator in my washing machine. The socks aren't necissarily "lost" in these examples, but they're not making it out with the rest of the clothes.

Another potential explanation is that the Underpants Gnomes are branching out. But that means that they're getting more ambitious, and I don't even want to think about what that means for civilization as a whole.