Thursday, November 16, 2006

15 - Answers

Q: Bill Jeffers - Black and Navy-still fashion faux pas or the new thing?
A: Didn't you used to work at Tuxedo Junction? Doesn't that make you more qualified to answer this question than me? I'm sorry, I'm answering your question with another question. That's not very useful of me.

I'm really not all that current on the latest in men's fashion (pants are still in, right?), but my impression is that black and navy together is just not right. Now, I'm not talking about wearing black pants and navy socks, or navy pants and black shoes. That's okay. But wearing black pants and a navy blazer is just wrong. I don't care if it's "the new thing" or not. It looks ugly. Is it a "faux pas"? Yes, I would say so.

Q: Joe Zaffarano - If a safe is unlocked, is it still a safe?
A: A safe can be basically defined as a container with a lock. This definition does not get into the state of the lock, merely that the lock exists. Therefore, the fact that a safe is unlocked does not make it not a safe. It is merely a state of the safe. So the answer to the question is yes, an unlocked safe is still a safe.

Q: Kevin Graves - Should I try learning a new musical instrument, or just stick to the drums?
A: Congratulations, Kevin. You win the award for best question this week. Let me first spin the story of the question (and please correct me if I get anything wrong). This question comes from a Pep Band Road trip to RPI. I think this was my Junior year, which would make it during Kevin's tenure as a graduate student. We were short a drummer for the trip, and so Kevin was lending a hand on the quads. He played some cheers and a couple of songs on the quads, and then switched back to his regular instrument (trumpet). After playing one song, a kid came up to Kevin and said in a serious and deadpan voice, "You should stick with the drums." The entire band was in stitches over this, and it became a running joke for months to come.

As far as your question, you should definitely stick with the drums. You already knew quite a bit about drumming when we played together in Pep Band, and rather than learning a totally new instrument, you should focus your energies on improving your drumming skills. And while you're at it, teach your son too :). The world can always use more drummers.

Thursday, November 9, 2006

14 - Answers

Q: Bill Jeffers - Who is next to get married? Translation: Which pussy will finally pony up and by the gad domned ring?
A: Silly answer: I am, because I caught the garter at the Stoffel wedding. As is the young woman who was unfortunate enough catch the bouquet and have the honor of my placing said garter on her leg.

Serious answer: For the first time in "Ask Mitssob" history, I'm going to refuse to answer a question. Allow me to explain why.

The decision to marry is a personal and private decision. As such, I am uncomfortable in making any predictions about it. The unmarried couples that I know undoubtedly have reasons why they haven't married, and it is not my place to speculate as to what they are. We've all been in relationships, and (I presume) that at least some of these haven't worked out. It's possible that these relationships will end prior to marriage, while others will see through to the event. But I'm not going to guess. It's not my place.

I realize that I sound as though I might be offended by the question. I'm not. I am choosing to respect my friends' privacy. And no, Bill, I'm not implying that you're being disrespectful. Not at all. My view is that if a couple decides to marry, then I will wish them the best of luck, and will provide my love and assistance to them whenever called upon. But I simply won't speculate as to which couples are destined to marry and which aren't.

Q: Brett Gobe - Was that a thinly vailed hint to Mit Ssob? Will Tim answer that question?
A: Being somewhat paranoid (as well as narcissistic), I'm going to assume that this question was directed at me. And as I said above, I'm not going to answer this question. Sorry, folks. I hope you understand.

Thursday, November 2, 2006

13 - Answers

Q: Brett Gobe - Klondike Bars and milk? That's alot of dairy.
A: Yeah, I realized that after I posted the answer. Good thing I’m not lactose intolerant.

Q: Adam Barnello - What do you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning?
A: This question comes from the song of the same name. The song is originally titled Sailor’s Holiday, and it’s a traditional “sea shanty”, or work song. The song begins:

What do you do with a drunken sailor (x3)
Early in the morning!

There are many verses which can be sung following this same style. Here are just a few that I find rather funny:

- Put him in the long boat till he's sober,
- Shave his belly with a rusty razor.
- Put him in bed with the captain's daughter.
- Rub him really smooth until he guffaws
- Threaten him with sharks til his’s sober

What would I do with a drunken sailor early in the morning? That would depend on the situation. If I were aboard a ship with said drunken sailor, I might join him. It would also depends on what the drunken sailor is doing. If he’s just sitting around being drunk, I wouldn’t have much of a problem with that. If he’s being belligerent and annoying, I’d probably do something about it. Like kick his ass or something.

I guess in the end my final answer is that I would interview him. Since he was drunk it would make the interview funny, and since he's a sailor he's undoubtedly done some traveling and seen some interesting things.

Q: Bill Jeffers - When will California fall into the ocean?
A: According to the atrocious NBC made-for-TV miniseries "10.5" it’s already happened. In reality, it'll happen many thousands of years from now. Though to be totally accurate California won't "fall into the ocean", but rather break off and become an island. So the answer to your literal question is "never".

Q: Karyn Graves - Will a 2.5 yr old enjoy a trip to DisneyWorld? Will he remember any of it?
A: I would say that your son would definitely enjoy a trip to Disney World. The sights, the sounds, the sheer "Disney Experience" all add up to a great time for kids of all ages (man, I sound like a commercial here). I think he's on the young end of the scale, but there's still plenty there to entertain him (and you and Kevin too).

As far as remembering anything about it, I have to say that I doubt it. As part of my research I asked Allison this question, and she told me that she went to Disney World when she was 3.5. She has only vague memories of the trip, and those are mostly of a side trip that her family took to Cape Canaveral. On my end, I went to Disney Land when I was about 5 years old. I remember bits and pieces of the experience, such as the flight over and going on various rides. Judging from this rather limited sample, I'd say that he might remember things like seeing his favorite Disney character walking around, or possibly a parade, but as far as life-long memories go that's probably unlikely. Let me know how it turns out!

Q: Brad Pettengill - How much halloween candy can I eat without getting sick
A: Two pounds. Not more. Any more than that and you’ll risk all sorts of unpleasantness for anyone who happens to be around you. I'm talking gastric difficulties on an epic scale. Mark my words!